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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life, by Mark Manson
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Review
“Resilience, happiness and freedom come from knowing what to care about--and most importantly, what not to care about. This is a masterful, philosophical and practical book that will give readers the wisdom to be able to do just that.” (Ryan Holiday, New York Times bestselling author of The Obstacle is the Way and Ego is the Enemy)“Mark’s ability to dig deep and offer amazing, yet counter-intuitive, insight into the challenges of life makes him one of my favorite writers, and this book is his best work yet.” (Matt Kepnes, New York Times bestselling author of Travel the World on $50 a Day: Travel Cheaper, Longer, Smarter)“This book hits you like a much-needed slap in the face from your best friend: hilarious, vulgar, and immensely thought-provoking. Only read if you’re willing to set aside all excuses and take an active role in living a f***ing better life.” (Steve Kamb, bestselling author of Level Up Your Life and founder of NerdFitness.com)“The opposite of every other book. Don’t try. Give up. Be wrong. Lower your standards. Stop believing in yourself. Follow the pain. Each point is profoundly true, useful, and more powerful than the usual positivity. Succinct but surprisingly deep, I read it in one night.” (Derek Sivers, Founder of CD Baby and author of Anything You Want: 40 Lessons for a New Kind of Entrepreneur)“An in-your-face guide to living with integrity and finding happiness in sometimes-painful places… This book, full of counterintuitive suggestions that often make great sense, is a pleasure to read and worthy of rereading. A good yardstick by which self-improvement books should be measured.” (Kirkus Reviews)
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From the Back Cover
In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger shows us that the key to being happier is to stop trying to be “positive” all the time and instead to become better at handling adversity.For decades we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. But those days are over. “Fuck positivity,” Mark Manson says. “Let’s be honest; sometimes things are fucked up and we have to live with it.” For the past few years, Manson—via his wildly popular blog—has been working on correcting our delusional expectations for ourselves and for the world. He now brings his hard-fought wisdom to this groundbreaking book.Manson makes the argument—backed by both academic research and well-timed poop jokes—that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to better stomach lemons. Human beings are flawed and limited—as he writes, “Not everybody can be extraordinary—there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault.” Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. This, he says, is the real source of empowerment. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties—once we stop running from and avoiding, and start confronting painful truths—we can begin to find the courage and confidence we desperately seek.“In life, we have a limited amount of fucks to give. So you must choose your fucks wisely.” Manson brings a much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor. This manifesto is a refreshing slap in the face for all of us so that we can start to lead more contented, grounded lives.
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Product details
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: HarperLuxe; Larger Print edition (December 31, 2018)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0062899147
ISBN-13: 978-0062899149
Product Dimensions:
6 x 0.5 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
5,008 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#292 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
A great read. A very entertaining romp through philosophical thought by a skilled wordsmith, but I would say the age cut-off for this book is 50. Beyond 50, you've probably already learned most of the lessons in this book the hard way, however, I can see where it can be extremely helpful for a generation that spends most of its waking hours posting narcissistic selfies on their iphones. Manson gives you the blueprints to get your head out of your ass, (or out of your phone) take a hard look at yourself and the real world around you, and shed many of the illusions you've been slowly poisoning your life with. If you're a millennial, or even a disenchanted X-gen, pick up this book. It will give you at least a more healthy point of view. But, if you're over 50, you're not going to find anything new in here except entertainment.
I've read quite a few "self-help" books in the last 30 or so years, always curious to see what the writers have to contribute. I went in with an open mind, but could barely finish this book. While there were some good points made early on (such as, we should concentrate on things that matter, like family and friends), there was little substance in about 150 pages of this 200 page book. Mr. Manson describes in detail the thoughts of several deceased persons, from Beatles drummer Pete Best to a WWII Japanese soldier, but does not reference the sources of his information. He theorizes that many of women's accusations of sexual misconduct by men are "false memories" and that men have been harmed in the process without recognizing the impact of this very real phenomenon of sexual misconduct on our culture. Regarding his account of how sometimes his wife "doesn't look great", and he suggests she change her clothes/hairstyle....just, wow. We'll see how that works out when she attains some confidence.I have to think that his "wildly popular" blog is followed primarily by readers much younger than Mr. Manson. When his followers mature, I think the writer would be well-suited for a job in search engine optimization. He has figured out that the most commonly searched word is f *ck.Unfortunately, I bought a hard copy of the book -- will likely just throw in the trash.
As someone who has given far too many f***s about far too many things their entire life, this book was exactly the wake up call I needed. Even as a child in elementary school, I would have a miniature meltdown when I got a bad grade or if a friend was mean to me that day. As an adult, I got better at hiding these emotional upheavals and intense reactions to the world around me, but they never really went away with my maturity like I had hoped. I took to heart every disheartening news article I read and every crappy thing that happened to me at work or in school. I'd let it consume me, because I was never told to live life any other way or that controlling my reactions was even remotely possible; I thought it was just a permanent part of my personality. I always knew that it was more of a vice than a virtue, but I felt like I couldn't fully control it.Mark Manson's The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*** employs a witty use of profanity laced with satirical comedy that's bursting with philosophical wisdom. Much of Manson's inspiration originates from nihilists, Buddhists, Albert Camus, and Charles Bukowski, but he brings those philosophies into a more modern and palatable perspective. He reminds us that life is too short to react so passionately about every little thing. We have a limited emotional capacity, and we often squander it on reactions to mean-spirited people or unfortunate events, completely forgetting that, although we can't control the world around us, we can control ourselves. This book has empowered me to exercise control over my reactions.Shortly after reading this book, my husband commented at how "zen" I've become. I'm no longer angrily venting to him about all of the various ways the world upsets me. I still allow myself to feel and talk about things that bother me (I'm not aiming to achieve nirvana as a Buddhist monk), but petty things no longer have a hold on me. I let the negativity wash over me now without letting it absorb into my soul, and my life has been much more enjoyable as a result.I was so inspired by this book and its philosophy, that I wanted a permanent reminder for myself to further ensure that I use my f***s wisely from now onward. For my birthday, I got this simple, but meaningful tattoo on my right wrist. The ∞ symbol reminds me of the infinite nature of time and outer space, and the 0 on the bottom represents humanity's relevance to time and space as a whole. It can also be translated as don't make something (∞) out of nothing (0) or a reminder that there are infinite opportunities to give a f***, but that I will remain steadfast in giving 0 f***s about things that don't really matter.If you're the type of person who's struggled to keep their temper in line or if you're like me and you find yourself on an emotional roller-coaster because you take every event in the world and within your own life to heart, I strongly encourage you to read this book. If profanity is so much of a problem for you, that you can't tolerate reading the first half of this book (the last half is much less profane) you're probably too narrow-minded to have taken away any of the many philosophical benefits this book offers.
What I like the most about this book is that my initial thought of; "This will be a good read- I'll probably get a provoking thought or two out of it", turned into, "Wow. This book has literally changed my life, for the better." Since I've finished it, I recommended it to four people, two of which have acquired the book, and I even got an extra copy as a gift for a friend. I intend to read this book every couple years or so for the times I need to be reminded of what improved my life so much in the first place. This is an easy read- yet written on a sophisticated level (despite the title), and I looked forward to every bit of free time I could dedicate to reading it. There were times I laughed, got teary eyed, and most importantly said, "hmmm, I never thought of it like that before..." I recommend this book to anyone who is open to changing their mindset, and can understand irony. Obviously the title is not instructing the reader to stop taking care in interest in EVERYTHING, so if that thought never crossed your mind upon reading the title, then I suggest you read this.
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